Strengthening your relationship is about meaningful communication, whether you are communicating through physical touch or telling your partner what’s going on in your life. If you find that you feel disconnected from your partner, think about how you communicate and interact with each other on a daily basis.
A lot of my clients feel anxious when their partner’s mood is off because of the chance that it could be about the relationship. But if you’re always in the know about what’s going on in your partner’s life, you will strengthen your relationship and feel more secure when things are difficult.
To help you strengthen your relationship, here are three simple things you can do every day:
Ask about your partner’s day
This is one of the most beneficial things you can do for your relationship. When you ask about your partner’s day, you build a friendship. You spend a lot of time away from your partner while you’re at work or at school. To build a more meaningful relationship, engage with them about the ups and downs of their day. Let them share their stresses and successes.
Of course, we often forget to do this when things get busy and we’re stressed. We get home exhausted after a long day and the first thing we want is down time. But if you ask about your partner’s day over dinner rather than zoning out, you will grow closer and begin to feel more connected. As you feel more connected, you will take things less personally when they are having a bad day. When we take the time and are aware of all the things our partner has going on in their life, we are more empathetic and patient with them.
Touch each other
Physical touch is the one thing you do with your partner that you don’t do with others. So do lots of it! Physical touch calms our nervous system and can bring us into this present moment. It calms the mind. Affectionate touching can make your partner feel taken care of and emotionally secure in the relationship. It brings fondness for each other, so touch each other often. Cuddle, hug and embrace during your time together, and notice how much more connected you feel.
Praise your partner
The most common complaint I hear from my couples is that one of them doesn’t feel appreciated. They feel taken for granted most of the time. Try to make an effort to start giving praise by offering compliments and acknowledging them for the simple things they do. When you don’t say thank you, you can give the impression that you’re being a taker. If your partner ends up feeling taken for granted, that’s where resentment builds. So, say thank you when your partner makes dinner, drives you somewhere, or runs errands for you. Tell them when you think they are doing a good job. Let them him/her know that you are proud of them. They will likely feel more loved.
These are three really simple and effective things you can do to strengthen your relationship and create emotional closeness. Make these three things something you do daily, and notice how you and your partner begin to grow closer.